Over the past eighteen months I’ve been in a process of massive transformation. One change I’ve made that has really supported massive growth and healing over the recent months is a morning routine that lights me up for the day ahead. In the past I’d tried to morning routines but they’d either been acts of immediate gratification that kept me feeling unhealthy and unfulfilled or unsustainable drills that were driven by effort and self flagellation. I wanted to share the thinking that has informed my new routines as an invitation and an offering, hoping they may be of help to you.
First of all there is no need to pick a motivation driven routine. Instead pick something that inspires you. Inspiration will keep the body heart and mind aligned way after motivation gets bored or tired and gives up. So if dancing is what lights you up dance! It may be a short prayer, a walk outdoors on your own, or with two/four legged loved one/s. I know someone who makes ritual porridge as a celebration and a meditation each morning. A wholesome fulfilling breakfast is a great way to set yourself up for the day. You may be someone who gets inspired by physical challenge and enjoy a run or a workout or a wild swim first thing. If it stops being inspiring change it!
I like to begin most days with some stretches and core stability exercises, then I go back to bed and do yoga nidra or guided meditation. After that I do breath work practice and then I might write for a little while about any insights that have landed with me. Then I take the dog for a nice long walk before beginning my working day.
Flexibility is important for me, and striking a balance between this and commitment to engaging well with life everyday. I need to listen to my whole being and see what it needs and I need to be able to adapt to my commitments and connections in the world. Some days I dance for a while then climb into a cold shower with my music playing. Occasionally I just lie in bed for half an hour and listen to my body and to the bird song, I then do a mindfulness writing practice to help me release from thinking and come into the present. These are usually days when my body needs more nurture so I have a beautiful bath with some soothing oil/salts in it too. I find if I don’t want to exercise a bath/shower helps me to ease into physical activity.
If I need to be somewhere early for work I get up earlier so I can keep that couple of hours just for me and still have plenty of time to be present and enjoy my dog and our walk together. I enjoy it so much and find it so regulating that it makes it easy to get up at 5am or 6am if I need to. I live alone just now but I’ve considered how I might vary my routine to include a partner or other family needs. Obviously this is something that would depend on who you were co-creating life with and the needs of the whole system but it’s worth looking at how each person in a household gets their needs met first thing. It doesn’t have to be a solo routine, you might have a cooking with the kids routine or a family meditation or agree to enjoy some sensual time with your partner or lover. Whatever sustains you and brings the qualities you want in your life.
At first getting up earlier was hard and doing movement was hard. I had a lot of resistance to doing mindfulness practice. Then I heard a phrase that really helped me and not just in this area of my life but all areas of my life. 100% is easy 99% is hard. Meaning if you devote yourself wholeheartedly to a project, routine or relationship you remove all the stress of doubting, procrastination and excuses and just throw yourself into it bringing all your energy and creativity with you. If it’s not right you find out but you know it’s not because you didn’t fully commit. So, I keep flexible about much of the content of my routine but I am 100% committed to setting myself up well for every day so that I can show up and be present in my day. So certain things are non negotiable, some form of meditation and some form of movement. There are a few other small things that are non negotiable one example is, I fold my bedsheets so that when I go to bed I feel cared for and comfortable. Your 100% areas may look different but I recommend having a few. Showing up for yourself even in small ways makes a big difference over time.
If you imagine there is a seed of potential for each day then the morning routine is planting that in good soil and making sure it is well watered. What do you need? What will grow you in the morning? What will make you feel fulfilled and ready? What is needed from you? Is there a way to make this joyful or at least peaceful? Sometimes a simple shift from thinking I have to do this and this to I get to do this and this is enough to shift your perspective. Other times you need to make some big changes to find inspiration for life again.
The creative possibilities for a morning routine are endless but if you get out of bed looking forward to the day ahead and feeling connected to yourself, I’ve found it makes a huge difference. I’ve spent too many days where I have dragged myself out of bed in pain and not present to myself or those around me and when I’m doing that I missing valuable moments of my life. Of course there will be days where life delivers unexpected things that need us to respond and that’s okay, it’s great, the morning routine is a scaffold to hold us and support our transition into the day. The right routine will also help us release from force and other conditioning and form our experience of the morning from grit into a pearl which will give us a foundation of peace, resilience and joy so that we can respond well when challenges and joys arrive to shake things up a bit!
Sadhguru an Indian mystic and campaigner for soil regeneration says that the first thing to do when you wake up is smile and be grateful that you’re still alive because each morning is a miracle and the next isn’t guaranteed! I think this is helpful unless it triggers you into urgency and reactivity. So I’ll leave you to chew on that thought. I do recommend mulling over how you begin your mornings now and how you might make them as delightful and supportive as possible so you have something that you look forward to at the start of each day. If you need support with this process consider booking a session with me.