How can I best be of service to life? What is my purpose?
Discernment
It’s easy to get caught up in familial and social conditioning when you are looking into your purpose. My mother was a doctor, both her parents were doctors and for a good part of my childhood I wanted to be a doctor. I knew it was what my mother wanted and my identity was tangled up with her also it was expected of me additionally my own deep dreams were not ones that were seen as worthwhile or secure. I wanted to be a gardener, a poet. I wanted to draw comics and make people laugh. Being authentic means finding, facing and unpacking my deepest fears and limiting beliefs.
Different challenges and obstacles face folks who come from families or communities where no one has ever been to university. A passionate calling may not be enough to transcend social prejudice, and low expectations. Trailblazers often encounter fear and resentment from their family and feel a sense loss and alienation from there community. Again finding authenticity and true connection means finding, facing and unpacking ones deepest fears and limiting beliefs.
This said, I also believe that rich and authentic sense of purpose can be found in meeting survival needs or from an inherited vocation.
Learning to discern between forcing life in a particular direction out of fear loss, or a false morality and finding joy in doing what is needed and in service of life is a real art.
Small steps
Take small small steps. I tend to feel fear, confusion, pressure and a sense of inadequacy when I broach this topic. I have to change my identity, thinking patterns and beliefs to overcome my subconscious blocks – finding your purpose isn’t a small thing.
What do I want to create? Why do I want it? What do I want to feel? What small steps can I take today to move towards more aliveness and connection. I imagine a version of myself who is deeply on purpose. What is this version of me doing, wearing and most importantly how they are thinking and feeling? I then begin to practice integrating these qualities into my life. For example writing this short post and making a commitment to collecting one piece of plastic off the beach on my daily swimming trips are tangible ways I can practice being of service even when I am unsure of what direction I want to focus on next. I’m in between houses at the moment and staying miles away in Cornwall so it’s easy to feel lost and disconnected from my work and purpose. Honouring this beautiful place while I am lucky enough to be staying here, exercising and offering this writing all support me to feel whole and creative even at times of uncertainty.
If you enjoyed this keep your eyes peeled for the next of my blogs as I explore more deeply the challenge to find our purpose in a disconnected society.
